Monthly Archives: January 2012

Using “What” and “How” Questions

Words. Even though much of how we communicate (more than 70% in some studies) is through our non-verbal expression, words still make a difference. We all know from experience that what we “send” is not necessarily what the receiver “hears.” Another way to think about words is to ask, “What is the word inviting from the other person?” What kind of pathway is opening or closing in response to the words I’m using? Continue reading

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Posted in Growing Responsibility, Motivation | Tagged , , , | 1 Comment

The Power of Asking (instead of telling)

why don’t kids do what we tell them to do? Radical thought: maybe because we are telling them. When you tell someone what to do they don’t have to think. They can listen or not listen – but then it goes away. Your daughter doesn’t have to think about or notice the mess, or her unfinished homework, or the chore she didn’t do or remember to write a thank you note. You are doing the noticing (and reminding) for her. In fact, when we parents do all the noticing and telling their brains don’t have to engage much at all! What a life! Continue reading

Posted in Connection and love, Growing Responsibility, Motivation, Mutual Respect | Tagged , , , , , | 4 Comments

Listen

Contributed by Julietta Skoog I am a talker by nature. I always have been. In high school I was on the debate team, in college I was the one hogging the hallway phone, and later in life I married a … Continue reading

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Why are girls so mean to each other? What can I do to help?

Nearly every girl is affected by girl bullying also known as relational aggression either by providing the hurt, receiving the hurt or watching it happen to others. Relational aggression has been a part of our girls’ world for a long time. It often happens between friends and can result in long-term, devastating hurt for those involved. As parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles and caregivers, we can support the girls we love through these heartbreaking times. Continue reading

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Small Steps into the New Year

A lot is written this time of year about what we “resolve” to do for the future. Goals are great but it can be really discouraging when, despite good intentions, they are not met. Continue reading

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