Category Archives: Self-care

Growing (Our) Character: Using the Practice of Gratitude, Centering and Forgiveness

The most challenging parenting moments for me are keeping my own emotional triggers in check when I am confronted with conflict involving my kids. Before I even realize I am acting from a place of emotion I am acting like the mother I so desperately do not want to be. I feel hot and tingly all over my body and, well, out of control. Guess what follows these mommy meltdowns? Shame. Shame that I can’t hold it together, that I am treating a person I love more than life itself in a way that makes them feel bad. Shame that I work to teach parents the principles of Positive Discipline and that I have failed, yet again, to embody those principles. Ick! Continue reading

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Posted in Connection and love, Feelings and emotions, Mistakes yours and theirs, Mutual Respect, Self-care | Tagged , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Tips and Resources for Talking to Children/Students About Awful Things

What makes events like the shootings in Newtown so terrifying is that is impossible to make sense of them. It is even worse when it seems like it should be preventable. It is hard for all of us. It is harder for children and adults who have been exposed to trauma. Continue reading

Posted in Feelings and emotions, Self-care | Tagged | Leave a comment

When We Notice That Life is Fragile

Life is fragile. The call to notice this is always there, but in a way that we can ignore. And we do. It is easier to move through life without always being aware of its tenuousness; that it could disappear at any moment. Continue reading

Posted in Connection and love, Feelings and emotions, Self-care | Tagged , , | 1 Comment

Why Do They Misbehave When We Are in a Hurry?

Misbehavior isn’t random. You already know that. Kids often misbehave at very inconvenient times! It happens particularly when we, the parent figures, are in a hurry. It is a consistent (and predictable) pattern. Are they out to “get” you? Well, yes and no. They are not out to “get” you in the sense that you will be bothered, annoyed, trapped or otherwise challenged. They are out to “get” you in the sense that they are seeking a connection with you. Continue reading

Posted in Conflict, Connection and love, Self-care | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

What is at the Center?

“What is at the center?” has been a question that has popped up a lot in my life recently. For me it is another way of asking, “For the sake of what am I doing this?” As I think forward to Thanksgiving and the many December holidays I’m asking myself what I really want. For me there are many layers of answers. I enjoy the company of my family and friends. I enjoy the rituals and traditions that in someway have made me who I am, that have given a structure to times that can be stressful, and when shared, connect our family with shared practices and a shared language. Continue reading

Posted in Connection and love, Self-care | 1 Comment

Ghosts in our Closets

As we enter the time of year when the days get shorter and nights get longer one of the traditions that many of us share in the United States is Halloween. Ghosts, goblins, witches (and now zombies) are part of the ambience and excitement of the tradition. This is the night when goblins roam the streets, we go out to look for scary things and explore “haunted” places as part of the ritual. We dress up, look fearful things in the eye and make it fun. (Yes, candy is part of the routine too.)

The following day we figure out how to deal with children who’ve over indulged on sweet things and put the costumes, the pumpkins, witches and ghosts back in the closet. At least the ones we can see. Many of us however have closets that are pretty full with different kinds of ghosts. We are haunted – not just on Halloween by challenging experiences from our own childhood. Continue reading

Posted in Feelings and emotions, Mistakes yours and theirs, Self-care, Uncategorized | Tagged , | 1 Comment

Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep – Or Not

Falling asleep (and getting enough sleep) would seem to be a normal, simple part of everyday family life—especially for children. But it turns out that it’s not so simple after all. Recent studies tell us that children today are getting an average of one hour less sleep each night than they did 30 years ago. That may not sound like much, but it turns out that that lost hour is having quite an impact.
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Posted in Routines, Science and parenting, Self-care | Leave a comment